'Forgive and Forget': Self-Repentance Promotes Health

It might be best to "forgive and forget," as they say.

A recent study conducted by researchers at Baylor College shows that forgiving ourselves for the pain we've caused others makes it easier to let go.

"One of the barriers people face in forgiving themselves appears to be that people feel morally obligated to hang on to those feelings. They feel they deserve to feel bad. Our study found that making amends gives us permission to let go," said researcher Thomas Carpenter, a doctoral student in psychology in Baylor's College of Arts and Sciences, via a press release.

Previous studies have shown the power of self-forgiveness and its effect on anxiety, depression and a weakened immune system.

For this study in particular, more than 250 participants were asked to recall diverse "real-world" offenses including romantic betrayals, rejection, gossip and even physical injury. They were also asked how much they have forgiven themselves for an actual offense, tried to apologize for the offense, felt that the other person had given up on them and how much they turned to self-forgiveness as a morally appropriate decision. The second study examined 200 patients who were asked about a hypothetical wrong.

Findings showed that the more participants tried to make amends, the more they felt that self-forgiveness was morally acceptable. Receiving forgiveness appeared to also grant others the ability to let go. However, if a wrong was more serious, findings revealed that individuals had more difficulty with the concept of self-forgiveness.

More information regarding the findings can be seen via The Journal of Positive Psychology.